History, before I continue on, a brief overview of my past might be beneficial, so to keep a long story short; its been four years since my last relationship, that lasted 18 months. Prior to that I spent six blissful years with Mr. Wonderful. I should note that I did met either of my latest beaus through an online dating service.
Anyway, On my journey to find a life partner, one of my closest friends heard through the gossip grape-vine,that I am in search of a serious long-term relationship. She felt the need to lend her support by giving me a copy of an New York Times article dated, Jan 9, 2015, titled, Quiz: The 36 questions that lead to love” by Daniel Jones. My first thought was, What the Hell? Here’s short version: These 36 questions are meant to probe deep into the mind of a prospective love interest. The purpose is to open the heart and mind to accept love and honesty.
Okay, I read through the questions, my second thought was, not bad,however, the quiz takes 90 minutes, that’s the suggested time limited. The creators of these questions is a brilliant group of psychologist who suggest that these questions will eliminate small talk, and will disclose openness and truth.
Wow! so, now the task is for me to find participants who are willing to sit for 90 minutes to ask and answer questions. That’s going to be one helluva 1st date.
If your curious about the 36 questions and I know you are, go to: htt://nyti.ms/BWQijj (the 36 questions that lead to love)
” You’re a beautiful and talent person why are you have trouble meeting a good man?” I hear this from close friends and family repeatedly. However, when I asked them, ” do you know someone in your circle of friends who would be interested in me?” the answer is always the same, “no” or ” I don’t want to be responsible if the relationship doesn’t work out.”
One of the problems with finding a suitable life partner is that no one meets the old fashion way; meaning face to face or being matched up on a blind date, that’s how my parents met, it seemed to work for them they had 12 children and were married 32 years. So, I’ve been encouraged to join an online dating services 😦
Now the dilemma, which one to choose there are so many, and for a fee they all promise, ” happily ever after.” Even-through I know couples who meet through an online dating service and many of whom have gotten married; my personal feelings is that it’s too impersonal. People sitting behind their computers judging a person by viewing pictures and what they read in the “about me” box.
Oh well, after some research and talking to real people about their experience, I’ve decided to part with a few bucks and enlisted a good friend who met her husband online to help me build my profile. We spent an hour selecting the best pictures, and composing details about me and what type of man I am seeking, and with a click of a button it was done. So I thought.
No, the task is not over, I was advised to find time to search through thousands of profiles to find my “soul mate.” And if that isn’t enough work I was told to watch dating tips from Matthew Hussey, he is supposed to be a dating expert/ guru. When I asked why, I was told that, ” There are lots of does and doesn’t in the world of online dating.” Now I am thinking, WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN MYSELF INTO?
In the interest of reviving my dying blog ( dragthepen) I’ve decided to make a bold move, and allow the few readers who are paying attention and those who aren’t, to have inside access to my latest project. Although I don’t think I should call searching for a life partner a project, its more like an experiment because I will be using expert courtship advice; something I’ve never done before.
I feel no shame that I’ve confessed out-loud that I’m going back out into the unknown world of COURTSHIP. Please take notice that I did not use the word dating because in today’s society, the word dating has a negative reputation; to some dating means that a person is sleeping around.
At the age of 52 I am not looking for a one night stand, a booty call or a good lay. I’m in the mood for an old fashion COURTSHIP; not the usual after three dates tag your it or not. I’ve been in the desert for several years, I am committed to taking take the necessary steps to slowly climb my way out of the dry and baron exile of single-hood. Over the next four months ( May 1-September -1) I will sign in with interesting tag lines like, ” he loves me or loves me not,” or ” another one bites the dust.” The end goal is not to find the perfect mate, but to at least find a suitable companion…more details to come.