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The Road I’ve Traveled

 

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In 2016, I embarked on a journey to explore the world of creative writing and a funny thing happened I discovered that I have a knack for telling stories and blogging about life. So, here I am three years later, and my journey has been awesome to say the least. I have self-published two short novels, The Waiting Game, a memoir of my struggles with relationship myths and how believing these myths can be damaging to women’s self-esteem. A Different Flavor of Love, chronicles the journey of a young single mother search for true love. The best news is that I created a You Tube channel, Conversations with J. R. Floyd, dedicated to exploring relationships and the lack of moral values. This has been an amazing journey of up and downs, self-discovery and renewal. I have arrived at an awareness of talents that pushed me to take risks and step outside of certain limitations to understand that I am capable of so much more than settling for the status quo. So, here I am introducing myself to the world an unknown writer, blogger and talk show host. My mission is to take my readers and viewers on a journey of discovering life beyond borders. Each month I will share what’s new in the world of J. R. Floyd, offer some tidbits of knowledge and mention some good reads, healthy life style choices, and share with you my latest episode from Conversations with J. R. Floyd. In the meantime, I encourage you to purchase one of my books available on amazon. Until then, the wait is over the choice is yours. Let’s have a Conversation.

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The Chosen Few

Dear readers, please read this with an open mind.

I was once asked who called me to Ministry, at that time I could not answer this question. Why, because I am a teacher by vocation, so I don’t consider myself a preacher, Ephesians 4: 11, And he gave some apostles; and some, prophets; and some, Evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers. For years people have said to me that God has a calling on my life. Now, if the question is what the will of God for my life is, I would answer like Paul, I am a servant of God and that this Ministry I have been called to is to serve the people who Jesus dedicated his short ministry too; the sick, poor, the outcast, the broken in heart and spirit, and those who have given up hope. As believers, some of us have lost sight of the original mission for following the life of Jesus, turning the House of God into a building for fund-raising, “and he said unto them, it is written, my house shall be called the house of prayer, but ye have made it a den of thieves” Matthew 21:13 KJV. What I am observing is that many of the House of Worship rarely distribute money into the community to provide support for the needy. Many others and I have become dissatisfied with Preachers who run from church to church collecting offerings for delivering the word of GOD. The teaching of God’s word should be given freely to whosoever will listen. Jesus took nothing, but he gave much. This world is filled with millions of Houses of Worship, yet the spirits in dark places seem to be winning. Houses of Worships are empty and closing not because people don’t believe, it’s because our spiritual leaders have forsaken their calling because they desire MEGA churches, with a MEGA choir and a MEGA congregation, which in turn will mean MEGA BUCKS.
Some Pastors do not honor the role that they have been chosen to serve, they forsake spending intimate time with their congregation, they don’t reach out to the sick, rarely show up for bible study or Sunday school, charge a fee for performing marriages, baptism and counselling. Some Pastors arrive at service just in time to perform their fifteen minutes of reading their sermons from paper or the lasts technology; while stumbling through the scriptures, quoting lines from songs to embellish and fill in between thinking what to say next. Once they have successfully solicited the correct emotionally responds their performance heightens by stomping and whomping. After is all said and done what have anyone learnt that can be used in their daily struggles of life. What have the congregation been taught? As I mentioned previously, I am a teacher by trade and talent, and as an educator my duty to my students is to impart skills and knowledge to help shape and prepare them to accomplish their dreams and goals.
Lastly, Pastors are referred to as shepherds, Jesus was the example of the good shepherd, “I am the good shepherd: the good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep” John 10:11 KJV. A shepherd’s prize possesses is his SHEEP. A good shepherd knows his sheep, he nurtures them, the shepherd understands that his sheep are dependent on him. A good shepherd makes provision for his flock, he walks among his sheep, he talks to them, he connects to them, they are all precious to him; “He tends His flock like a shepherd; He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart. He gently leads the nursing ewes” Isaiah 40:11 KJV. I am not preaching religion nor is my purpose is to convert my readers. What I have spoken here is what I have observed and here other believers voicing their concerns about the lost sheep crying out in the wilderness and the shepherds who are ignoring their cry.

What Say you?

J. R. Floyd ( Dragthepen)

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2018 Year In Review

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Dear Readers,

This has been a year of tumultuous ups and downs and devastating loss.  It all started when I thought that I had found the one my soul loves only to be bamboozled into a nightmare of an engagement that I had to end. I relocated three times and during each move I lost sentimental items not to mention time and money. My graduate thesis was rejected, and I had to postpone the date of my oral exam for my ordination because of my personal turmoil. I lost focus, discipline and drive, thus leading me to gain twenty pounds that I am struggling to lose. It has taken me months to reach a point of emotionally stable.

Now the good news……

Because of this year’s struggles I wrote a sequel to my memoir, The Waiting Game, I titled it, “90 days of Reflection, Discovery and Renewal.”  I will publish this 90-day emotional journey summer 2019. My broken engagement was the brick wall that shocked me into a serious reality check. I became aware of the damage I caused myself by allowing fear to rule my decisions. I have made excuses and held myself back by not taking risk to achieve my goals. I have wasted years singing the WHEN song. When I get a higher paying job, when I complete my education, when I find a suitable partner, when I have my own home, when I lose the weight, when, when, when….I have not lived to my fullest potential because I continue to think that there has to be a perfect time for life to be enjoyed.  After 90 days of deep reflection and the awareness of the patterns in my life that keep me stuck in a vortex of dead ends; I can move forward with better clarity, purpose and mindfulness. I don’t have the luxury to wallow in self-pity or to play the role of the victim. Although, I have fallen numerous times and managed to get back up. However, this time is different I had to pull myself back on my feet by crawling and hauling myself up one level at a time. I was literally stripped down to ground zero, but the rebuilding of my life and the restructuring of my goals is better because my outlook and purpose is more meaningful.

Moving Forward…..

I have been feverishly working to remove most of the people, places and things that I see as obstacles while rerouting my life. My living environment is spacious, quiet and conducive to helping me to maintain my sanity. I have taken steps to regain my health by working with a wonderful vegan nutritionist and personal coach for a 90-day makeover starting Jan 1, 2019, I am very excited to get started. Each New Year’s Day I teach a workshop for creating Vision Boards, this year’s theme will be: Pray, Plan and Work for the life you want. I am eternally grateful to my friends, family and colleagues who gave me their time and support during the most difficult days. I am ready for change, but most important I feel a sense of clarity and happiness that has been absent from my life. My hope is that my readers will read this and reflect and discover ways to Renew the area of their life that has lost its light and happiness. HAPPY, HEALTHY, BLESSED NEW YEAR.

J. R. Floyd (Dragthepen)

 

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Relationship Drama?

Dear readers,

I am a firm believer that people aren’t meant to be alone. When I say alone I’m referring to being without a capable partner. Being alone today is a choice that more and more people are making because they not open to the unnecessary relationship drama. Let me clarify this statement a good long-term relationship takes effort, time, work and a lot of energy. Both partners must be willing to commit to working on his/her own personal growth, while supporting the foundation of their partnership. There will be certain aspects of a relationship that require more work than other areas. If SACRIFICES have to be made it should be done for the improvement of the partnership, therefore, no one  should feel that his or her needs are not being given equal attention this is called BALANCE. When a couple decides to cohabitate, there should not be a division of responsible based on GENDER. Yes, there will be things that your partner is better at such as laundry, and that’s OK.  In the house that I was raised there was no labeling of women chores versus what a man should and should not do in the home. My father’s theory is that men should contribute in the home as a means to show support, respect and love for his wife. In this way they model for their children how a family unit work together as a team.

Communication between a man and women should be done on an open and fair level. I do not take kindly to my partner raising his voice at me and taking to me in a tone of a parent or  using profanity.  Remember harsh words that are said in the heat of anger are the words that hurt the most and they cause irreversible damage. A person can forgive but they will never forget. the structure of relationships have changed because of misconceptions, unreasonable expectations, and learnt dysfunctional behavior. We  live in a society of broken  men and women who have been abused, played games, experienced deception by people they trust, lack love, compassion, and there is a shortage of individuals who desire to commit to an old-fashioned monogamous relationship.

These factors and more have contribute to people throwing up their hands in submission and surrendering to being without a partner. I have seen an increase in people who prefer to adapt a pet than to become entangled with the unnecessary drama of a relationship. And this is where I find myself, I am not weary of being without a partner, and yes, I have a dog named jo-jo, who greets me every morning and evening with excitement and love in his eyes. Don’t get me wrong our partnership as owner and pet is not a perfect one. We have out days when he barks a little louder than usual and I cross my arms and stand my ground. There are days when he wants me to get up early because he wants to go out. There are days that he begs for some table scraps and I give in. But we have an unspoken bond. I take care of him, respect his space, give him my undivided attention when he is barking louder than usual, and in return I have a best friend for as long as life will allow us. Now who wouldn’t want this?

what say you?

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For These Reasons

Dear readers,

I am a firm believer that people aren’t meant to be alone. When I say alone I am referring to being without a capable partner. Being alone in today’s society is a choice that more and more people are making because they not open to the unnecessary relationship drama. Let me clarify this statement a good long-term relationship takes effort, time, work and a lot of energy. Both partners must be willing to commit to working on their own personal growth, while supporting the foundation of their partnership. There will be certain aspects of a relationship that needs more work than other areas. If SACRIFICES have to be made it should be done for the improvement of the partnership, and no one person should feel that his or her needs are not being given equal attention this is called BALANCE. When a couple decides to cohabitate, there should not be a division of responsible based on GENDER. Yes, there will be things that your partner is better at doing such as laundry, and that’s ok.  In the house that I was raised there was no labeling of women chores versus what a man should and should not do in the home. My father’s theory was that men should contribute in the home as way means to show support, respect and love for his wife. In this way they model for their children how a family unit work together as a team.

Communication between a man and women should be done on an open and fair level. I do not take kindly to my partner raising his voice at me and taking to me in a tone of a parent or   using profanity Remember harsh words that are said in the heat of anger are the words that hurt the most and they cause irreversible damage. A person can forgive but they will never forget. Relationships have changes because of misconceptions, unreasonable expectations, and learnt dysfunctional behavior. We have society of broken of men and women who have been abused played games, experienced deception by people they trust, lack love, compassion, and there is a shortage of individuals who desire to commit to an old-fashioned monogamous relationship. These factors and more have contribute to people throwing up their hands in submission and surrendering to being without a partner. I have seen an increase in people who prefer to adapt a pet then to become entangled with the unnecessary drama a relationship. And this is where I find myself, I am not weary of being without a partner, and yes, I have a dog named jo-jo, who greets me every morning and evening with excitement and love in his heart. Don’t get me wrong our partnership as owner and pet is not a perfect one. We have out days when he barks a little louder than usual and I cross my arms and stand my ground. There are days when he wants me to get up early because he wants to go out. There are days that he begs for some table scraps and I give in. But we have an unspoken bond. I take care of him, respect his space, give him my undivided attention when he is barking louder than usual, and in return I have a best friend for as long as life will allow us. Now who would want this?

What Say you?

Don’t forget to watch my Youtuve channel: Conversations with J. F. Floyd

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