Education

When

Dear readers,

Don’t live your life singing the” When” song.  Most people think  they that need certain conditions in their life to be happy. Although, in some cases this may be true, but putting off certain goals that we have control over only leads to time wasted and regrets. Don’t be one of those people who say things like, when I acquire an education I will be happy. When I earn more money then I can travel and see the world. When I move into a better house then I can enjoy myself. When I lose the weight then I will look better. When my children grow up then I can concentrate on my life. When I save up a certain amount of money then I will feel secure. When I have time I will start or finish that project. When….When…. the time to live life is now. Each day we should experience something new, and  most importantly, make time for the people in our life who truly matter. The time is now….. When may never come.

What Say you?

J. R. Floyd

amazon.com/author/rahshemahfloyd

 

Education

Brokenness

Dear readers,

When God said, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a helper” his originals intention of creating a helper (partner) is for man and woman to walk together side by side as comparable partners. In today’s society, people in partnerships (relationships) are struggling to raise above the nonsense of unrealistic  rules set forth by a society that thrives on dividing men and women by creating foolish  relationship does and don’ts aimed at suppressing women thus moving men in a place of superiority. The main cause for partnerships falling apart is the need for control resulting in the partnership becoming a dictatorship because there is a feeling of OWNERSHIP. People become trapped in these types of partnerships and they often become a dangerous and violent situation. The question is not why, but how. During the dating or courtship, stage the individual who wished to woo their perspective partner will show who they need to be until they are sure that they have completely captured their perspective partner under a spell of lust and love, this is when they show their true self. And the true self isn’t the person who enticed them. Millions of men and women are taught misleading lessons about their role in a partnership, they are told false relationship myths, and bear the wounds of destructive relationships. Some experiences come in the form of dysfunctional families, spousal and child abuse, and abandonment issue meaning that some people choose to remain in a dictatorship in fear of being alone. Men and women are  burden with mistrust and lack the knowledge and skills to communicate their emotions, so they suffer in silence. Partnerships are hindered by the baggage that each person has not resolved thus expecting their mate to be their therapist. Men and women feel the need to control their partner because they have lived a life where others had control over them and they could fight back. These personality types will slowly crush their partners mentally, verbally, emotionally, sexually and financially. These cycles of abuse people have experienced in their past. Sadly, we obverse partnerships like these in our own families, and among our friends, people whisper about the abuse, but do not speak out. Until we as a society understand that, sometimes it also takes a village to help develop and sustain healthy and long-lasting partnerships by addressing the brokenness of each individual the cycle will continue. Thus creating the next generations of broken partnerships, haven’t we had enough?

What say You?

 

 

Random Thoughts

Independence Versus Dependence

Dear readers,

Independence or self sufficient, in my opinion, has too many “SELFS”, self – sufficiency, self  governed, self- rule, self-determined, and self-reliance. There are songs and poems written about being Independent. Just for a moment think about this, are we truly independent. The truth is we don’t think about how dependent we are on the air we breathe, the food we eat to sustains our bodies, the money we earn, and for love and compassion from our family and friends. Although these things are conceivably true, we live in a society that imparts individualism, the moral worth of the individual. However, Charles R. Swindoll, wrote that, we are truly not independent. When the wind of adversity blows hard against our soul. we cannot make it on our own. We were created for dependence, not independence. We need each other.

What say you?

Drama

The Relationship Talk

You said “I’m running away,” but when I look down my feet are firmly planted on the ground.

You said, “I’m not willing to give in and let myself go.”

So, I said, “self-let’s think about this running away, giving in and letting go.” I’ve spent many days and nights pondering silently and sometimes speaking aloud about this “running away, giving in and letting go.” And I’ve come to concluded; what I am running away from the old stale, complacent, routine of a “RELATIONSHIP,” and the lack of romance, no not sexual intercourse, but good ole fashion remember the flowers, a love note or card, holding hands and a gift on date night just because.

I’m running away from being suffocated by a partner who continually whimpering about the lack of attention, which translates into not enough sex. Running from the idea that I owe wifely duties without the ring. Running away from not being supported, respected, valued and permitted space to grow as an individual.  Running away from the proposed thinking that we are one, Yep, when I think about it, I am running……..

Part 2, the unwillingness to give in. I do not quit comprehend what is meant by the term “give in.” Repeatedly in my mind I said “give in; give in” until the meaning became clear, don’t you mean, “Give up?”  Give up my time, passion and aspirations for the well-being of the “RELATIONSHIP” because there is no longer me, I, or self, but we, us and ours.

Finally, “letting myself go.” Hmmmmm…Go where and why? Do you mean immersing myself into the abyss of the “RELATIONSHIP” so deep that I forget who I am, and what I want out of this life, my life? Do you see where I am going with this?  I am running away, unwilling to give in and not letting go because…………..maybe you don’t need to know why?

This is what you should know. I would run towards and hold onto a man who truly understands and illustrates the qualities of what it means to be committed “PARTNERSHIP.” I am willing to give into and let myself go to walk on the wild side, with a man who accepts me as I am and sees’ the value of having me as their life partner.

I would like to feel secure and cared for by a man who is supportive of my career goals, ministry, and love for pets, romance and quite time. I am not willing to run to or give into and let myself go for a temporary lay or for Mr. Right now. I am willing to take a chance on always and forever.

What Say You?

Random Thoughts

Reality Check

Dear readers,

Lately, I’ve called attention to people’s mannerism or lack thereof, and the words that we use or have taken out of our vocabulary. My parents raised me and my siblings to see the good in people, to share, be kind, and if we didn’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.  I know that their instructions were given with love and for intention, to see their children mature into caring adults. However, they were raised during an era when people had different values, and family and community was a very important part of everyday life.

Fast-forward………. Today most people don’t think in terms of what’s good for their community or family. It is difficult for me to come to terms with the truth that are “Self-thinking.” And that Self-centered people don’t have any sentiments about the impact that their negative, selfish, and arrogance have on others. Recently, my blinders were unkindly ripped from my eye, to my astonishment I’ve been living in denial. Let the truth be told, people have become cold and malicious, I regret that there is no “Nice” way to say this. I’ve spent too much time making excuses for people who aren’t “good.” I’ve gave freely of my time to people who didn’t deserve it.  My time would have been better spent volunteering at an animal shelter. First, for my love of cats and dogs, second, they are deserving of the love and the time I give to them.

Now, the last part of my parent advice, “say something nice” I’m happy that I no longer exist in denial, and that the blinders are off, it never too late to learn. I intend to be on my guard, I will ask questions, no longer will I give freely of my time, and finally, everyone who smiles or calls me friend don’t necessarily have good intentions.

What say you.

Random Thoughts

Family Ties

Dear readers,

It’s easy to become routine about the things we say we are grateful for like, life, good health shelter, and our daily bread. On Sunday, March 26, 2017, the day after my birthday, while having dinner with my sisters I was reflecting on the importance of staying connected to family. Sometimes when we feel that life is empty because we lack an intimate or should I say romantic relationship, however, this may not be the whole truth. Examine closely the time spent away from family, this might be the connection that your heart is yearning for. Family should never be taken for granted, Because at the close of the day all we have is God and Family.

What Say You?

Random Thoughts

The Conversation

Dear readers, Sixteen days into the new year. Question how is those RESOLUTIONS working for you?

Well, if you haven’t read my post the Bucket list versus Resolutions, I’ve come across a list of 20 Questions by  author Martha  Nibley Beck,   an American sociologist, life coach, best-selling author, and speaker who specializes in helping individuals and groups achieve personal and professional goals.

Maybe its time to stop looking at that list of New Years Resolutions and have a serious conversation with yourself. Its Martha Beck’s theory  that these 20 question will help you to find the answers to some of life’s dilemmas by asking  the right questions.

  1. What questions should I be asking myself?
  2. Is this what I want to be doing?
  3. Why worry?
  4. Why do I like ________ more than I like _____?
  5. How do I want the world to be different because I lived  in it?
  6. How do I want to be different because I live in the world?
  7. Are vegans better people?
  8. What is my body telling me?
  9. How much junk could a chic chick if a chic chick could chuck junk?
  10. What’s so funny?
  11. Where am I wrong?
  12. What potential memories am I bartering, and is the profit worth the price?
  13. Am I the only one struggling not to ____?
  14. What do I love to practice?
  15. Where could I work less and achieve more?
  16. How can I keep myself absolutely safe?
  17. Where should I break the rules?
  18. So say I lived in that fabulous house in Tuscany, with untold wealth, a gorgeous , adoring mate, and a full staff of servants…then what?
  19. Are my thoughts hurting or healing?
  20. Really truly: Is this what I want to be doing?

What Say you?